1. Saturday detention is awful. Waking up early PLUS having to sit in school on the weekend is seriously cruel and torturous! How many times have you had to be there before?
Just once. Ugh. And I missed a sale at the mall-- SO annoying! A handful of times. I go when I feel like it, basically. Well, I usually get out of it for a game, but this is my second time going. Are you kidding? I practically live in the library on Saturdays. I'll be here for ''the rest of my natural born life.'' This is my first and will definitely be my last time. I'll never be late to homeroom again!
2. School bus seating is like a mapping of school social hierarchy. So where's your unspoken permanent seat?
What is... I sit up front to talk to the bus driver, Larry about Jeopardy last night. I'm at school early and late for practice so I don't take the regular bus. Ew! The bus? Gross. I get a ride every day. Somewhere in the middle. I try to blend into my surroundings. In the back. And if anyone dare take the seat I've etched by name into with my pocket knife, that knife will meet their jugular!
3. So you're standing on line in the caf with your friends and someone not in your social group says ''hi'' randomly. You...
say hi quietly so your friends don't think it's weird that you're talking to this person. say hi, but then make fun of him/her to my friends as soon as s/he left. laugh. Who the hell does this kid think s/he is? say hi back, of course-- it's only polite. look to see if maybe s/he was trying to get someone else's attention. Why would anyone be talking to me?
4. If I were to flip through your yearbook, which superlative would your name most likely be under?
Um-- none! I didn't even get my picture taken for that stupid POS. Most Individualistic Most Likely To Succeed Best Dressed Most Athletic
5. Just like Will Smith said, parents just don't understand. What do you and yours fight about mostly?
We don't fight. They basically ignore me. Grades, homework, college, and grades some more. My image. They want me to be someone I'm not. They think I'm a stupid, worthless, no good, freeloading, son of a bitch, retarded, big mouth, know it all, a$$hole, jerk. Oh... and did I mention ugly, lazy, and disrespectful? They could go on and on. They think I'm spoiled-- but that's their fault! They did it to me.
6. Put on those boxing gloves. Which sounds most like something someone would say to you in a fight?
You're a Neo-Maxi-Zoom-Dweebie! You can't think for yourself! You may as well not even exist! You're so conceited! You keep unloading all these tremendous lies!